Air Travel with Baby

Next week, Tuesday morning at 12am to be exact, I will be getting on a plane with Em and flying home to Kansas to see my family.

There are SO many great things about this statement. Like how she finally gets to meet her family from that side, which in just immediate family is 2 uncles, 1 aunt, 6 cousins, 3 grandparents, and 3 great grandparents. All of which are SO excited to meet her as well. The lower altitude helps growth and there is so many things, finger foods at least, that just don't exist here in Quito. And a million other things.

But there are bad things too. One, we're leaving dadas here for two and a half months! We'll be back before Christmas and her birthday but still, it's a LONG time.

Two, I hate flying. I'm afraid of it. As in, shaking in my seat and praying the whole time until we touch down terrified.  And I'm going with my 9 month old.

I don't want to go just because of this.

I'm not sure what happened. I used to love flying and then one time I just got on the plane and became a shaking pile of goo, tapping my seat, holding onto an old woman hand for comfort as she promised it was all going to be just fine. Yeah, that was me. So, yeah, not looking forward to the plane ride.

But in order to go home and see my family and have them meet Em, it's a necessary evil.

I'm trying not to worry but hello? I'm a mom. And I worry, even more than I did before. But I'm going to try anyway.

Anyway, even though I am afraid I have started packing because when you worry it's always best to get something done. Time goes faster and the worry isn't right there on the surface. Still there but not as noticeable.

So I decided to make a list. I don't want to take a lot of stuff aboard the place. That's just too much to worry about. I want to go with light and easy. This is what I've come up with... just for Em. For me, I used the one page packing list but am going to go ahead and check my bag anyway.

• Diapering Supplies
• 7 diapers (other websites say 1 for each hour plus extras. WHAT? I'm sorry but that's just plain ridiculous. I didn't use a diaper every hour when she was a newborn, and I'm not going to use that now. I picked 7 because I usually change her diaper about 6 times in 24 hours. We'll be traveling for about 12 hours)
• Travel wipes - package comes with about 48 wipes. Can't see us needing more than that
• Plastic bags - this could go in any section because it works for dirty clothes, spoons, diapers, and so on. A must have!
• Can't Live Without
• Bunny bear - Em's bear she sleeps with. CANNOT. LEAVE. WITHOUT.
• Small toy - for distracting
• Wrap - For Em to sleep in during the plane and to carry while going everywhere else
• Clothes
•  2 extra outfits. I'm going to Kansas and I have no idea what the weather will do. That's the beauty of Kansas! So I'm taking one for warm weather and one for colder weather.
• 1 pair of socks
• Pajamas - I think these are actually called rompers. Either way they are these footed pajama like things. I don't think I'll feel like unloading everything when I get home.
• Jacket - Just in case its on the chilly side
• Food/Drink
• 2 bibs
• 2 spoons
• Measured rice cereal
• Measured formula
• 2 bottles for mixing
• 2 food bowls with lids
• 4 baby food jars (1 meat, 1 veggie, 2 fruits) 
•  Miscellaneous
• Fever reducer
• Thermometer

Some maybe wondering what about a blanket? Well, I have a jacket for her and the wrap she'll be in will keep us both plenty warm. Not taking a car seat or stroller because we have those waiting for us when we arrive and I didn't buy her a ticket. Plus my car seat that we bought here isn't approved for air travel... or at least it doesn't have a sticker saying so. But as for everything else... Have I forgotten anything? Please let me know if you think so!

Also any advice??

Parenting On Instinct

When you read attachment parenting articles/books/blogs you'll usually read something about it being instinct if we listen to ourselves rather than others.

I'm here to say that's a lie.

What would I have done had I not read anything?

I'd have used a stroller. I'd have bought jarred baby food. And above all I would have formula fed.

What to I do instead? Babywear. Make homemade baby food (with the use of this lovely website) and breastfeed.

As for other attachment parenting ideals. Disposable diapers and crib sleeping for me!

Breastfeeding wasn't instinct for me. The first days were not hard. She latched easily and ate as the websites said she would. 1-3 hours.

No that was all right. Breastfeeding itself was awkward though. I didn't enjoy it. I wanted to give the baby a bottle and the only thing that stopped me (besides my stubborn nature) was the websites saying how much better it was. I read the benefits over and over etching them in my memory.  Breast was best and would give her lifelong benefits. My aversion would NOT stop me from providing that for her.
After a few weeks. I'd say between the 5-6 week it got better just like that and I enjoyed the special time Em and I got to relax together.

But instinct had nothing to do with it. Instinct would have led me to formula.

Because in reality instinct for humans is not the same as for other animals. We are in fact different from our four legged friends.

I don't know if at some point humans relied on instinct or if we've just gone with what works. To me it is our brains that are our instincts and it is not the same.

Humans do what is socially and culturally acceptable. Is this a bad thing? Yes and no.

We have evolved. We are shaped by the world we've created, products of our environment. Sometimes we get it right, sometimes we don't.

But the idea of relying just on instinct to raise our children? No. We're too smart for that and our instincts can betray us.

Or it did me.

So research. But be smart about it. If you feel strongly about something do it, no matter what the research says.

Huh. That went against my whole post didn't it?

I guess what I'm trying (and FAILING) to say is be the best parent you know how to be. Listen to your instincts, yes, but it doesn't hurt to look into things either.

Marriage and Babies

Pedro and I were married three and a half years before Em came along.

Today makes four years.

I read a lot during pregnancy as I've mentioned before and kept coming across articles about how much the relationship with a spouse would change after the baby.

6 months into this and what have I discovered?

It only changes if you let it.  Well, for the most part.

Some things change in general like not being able to catch a movie or grab diner without significant planning in advance. Or staying up late for a movie marathon or staying in bed all morning just cuddling.

But everything else?

Pretty much the same.

We fight like we used to just have different topics now. We still talk about everything, not just the baby. We find time for the two of us.

I am very glad we had 3 years just us and I'm equally happy we have Em now. I truly love my family.

First Year Nutrition

The other day I was reading a forum and found a question I'd wondered myself even though I thought I knew the answer.

It was something like "Is 5 feedings a day enough for my 6 month old?"

How would I have answered?

Yes. Just keep an eye on diaper count and you should be fine. Also if she needs 6 feedings one day don't say no. Feed her when she's hungry if that's 10 feedings then feed her 10 but if its 5 feed her 5.

To me that sounds reasonable. But that is not the response this women got.

No. She got things like this...

"I feed my 3 year old 5 times a day! And my 8th month old still eats 8-10 times a day! That is not enough!"

There were maybe 4 responses almost exactly like that.

I have a few things to say about that.

1. Let's not forget all babies are different. Just because YOUR baby eats that many times doesn't mean HERS has to.

2. I may get alot of... what to call it? Slack? Sure. But I'm gonna say it anyway. Your 3 year old does not NEED to nurse 5 times a day. He/she WANTS to.

3. 8-10 feedings a day is probably fine fir her 8 month old but she probably doesn't get as much as this womans child in the same feeding.

4. Stop judging! I mean as long as the baby is gaining weight what does the number of feedings matter?

I wanted to make an account just so I could comment on the question so at least someone who say it was just fine.

But I knew I would have also said something directed at the other women and then wouldn't I be just like them?

Judging another mother because she does something differently. So I refrained. But it got me thinking...

Formula. Breastmilk. Stroller. Wrap. Crib. Co-sleeping.

Just stop.

If it was... Feed. Starve. Talk. Hit. Watch. Ignore. Love. Hate. Then yes! Get involved but let's stop all this nonsense. If the baby is loved fed sheltered and clothed. Well let the mom do it how she wants to.

Am I wrong here?

I was talking to someone on Monday and mentioned breastfeeding going ok but I was concerned about weight gain and instead of asking about the weight gain issue it was "oh my god. You're still breastfeeding? Don't be one if those mothers who breastfeed forever. "So and so" breasted "baby" until 18 months and it was so gross."

I don't know how long I'm going to breastfeed. I hope for the full year. But whatever I choose its my choice. No one else's.

And I could have spouted off all these facts about breastfeeding and how formula doesn't even come close and how on earth she could have formula fed her kids but I didn't.

Why?

Because her children are HERS not mine. And I have no say in how she fed them.

I only ask for the same thing in return.

Well, that's my rant for the day. Besides all that... hope everyone is having a good week!

25 Things To Do With A 5 Month Old

Everyday I get up with Em at about 6:50 am. She is probably awake around 6:30 but my legs won't budge until closer to 7 and she usually talks to herself for awhile so I take that time to get a few more minutes of rest.

As I shuffle across the hall I think about the day ahead of me wondering what we'll do.

Its not always the easiest thing to figure out because the little ones get bored so easily but here are a few things we usually do during the day...

1. Tummy time: Em loves being on her tummy now. She rolls over almost instantly when I put her down.

2. Talking: This is usually something we do when I'm busy doing something else. I sit her somewhere and we jabber back and forth. But we do this almost always, whether one on one or from a far.

3. Play in the Grass: Em loves feeling it ob her toes and in her hands and sometimes in her mouth!

4. Walk Outside: She loves being outside in general. I'll take her for a quick walk in neither the strolled or wrap but holding her and point out things like trees and the sky. If we walk in the sun I'll tell her that's why its warm, if the wind blows I let her know. She's very alert outside like she's soaking in everything.

5. Dancing in the Kitchen: When she's in a bad mood this usually cheers her up. I pick her up and we twirl around the room for awhile listening to (moms) favorite songs.

6. Singing: I have a terrible voice but she doesn't seem to mind much. I sing everything. What's on the radio. Children songs like the itsy bitsy spider or wheels on the bus. Or something I've made up.

7. Airplane: we do takeoff and landing. Sometimes even crash landing!

8. Peek-a-boo: She just started to really enjoy this.

9. Piggies: You know "this little piggy went to market..."

10. Mirror Talk: She adores the baby in the mirror. She tries to grab her and hug her but always ends up bumping her head. Go figure!

11. I got you!: I usually do this after I clean a dirty diaper before I button her onesie and before/after a bath. I say i got you and blow raspberries on her tummy. She cracks up every time.

12. Play the Guitar: I try to show her some of the cords for fun but most of the time we end up just fooling around and beating on it like a drum.

13. Yarn: I give her yarn to run through her hands. Don't ask why but she gets so excited about it.

14. Reading: This we do before bedtime and naps! She has one book she adores called shoe-la-la

15. Face/hand exploration: I get really close to her and let her play with my ears nose cheeks etc. Or I give her my hand and she checks it out and stuffs it in her mouth.

16. Kitty: She loves penny our cat. She gets so excited with her just walking past her. If penny agrees I let Em pet her making sure she doesn't grab and pull.

17. Chores: This activity usually depends on the chore. When I make my bed I cover her up in blankets. While I'm doing laundry I pass her some clothes and tell her to fold them. She usually ends up sticking them in her mouth instead. When doing dishes I name off the items I'm washing while she sits in her swing. It usually takes longer than it would without her but that way during naps I get to write instead of clean. Plus she enjoys it!

18. Snuggle time: This only happens after she eats. She's already in my lap and in a good mood so we cuddle for a few minutes (sometimes only seconds, others as much as 10 min) until she's done and wants to play.

19. Sink time: I turn on the faucet and hold her as she plays in the water.

20. Making a racket: I give her toys (or plastic kitchenware) and let her bang them together. To be honest I'm usually the one who bangs them. She mostly mouths them.

21. Picture Time: I live about 3000 miles away from my family so I show her pictures of her aunts and uncles, grandparents, cousins so she know who they are.

22. Mimics: I try to mimic her sounds and facial expressions.

23. Cook Together: When she's in the mood I'll set her up in her swing or car seat and we chatter while I cook. I let her see what ingredients im using. I let her feel the fruit or the veggies. I show her the meats and the utensils I'm using. If however she's in a bad mood I'll put her in the carrier except for when I need to be by the stove.

24. Bouncing/walking: She pulls up to a standing and tries to walk around my lap or bounces up and down. She loves to be in motion!

25. Alone time (supervised): Some time playing by herself is also needed. I get a few things done I can't do with her and she rolls around on the floor talking to her stuffed animals or bitting on her toys or playing with her toes.

What do you and your LOs do??

Breastfeeding VS. Formula Part IV: Your Choices Are YOUR Choices

I read an article once about this woman whose child wasn't gaining weight and even after 3 months with no weight gain on breastmilk alone the women felt awful about giving her daughter formula.

She tried and it didn't work. She gave it her all and it didn't work.

So why would she feel awful about that? Because 1. She wanted to breastfeed and it was awful to her that she couldn't. 2. Other people made her feel like less of a mom

I want to stress I am 100% for breastfeeding. I think breast really is best but if my daughter wasn't doing well on it then I would give her formula. And if someone didn't want to breastfeed or couldn't I wouldn't make them feel bad about it or say they didn't try hard enough.

My sister didn't even try breastfeeding. She had no intention of it and feed both her boys formula right from the start. Both boys are very healthy.

So even though I think breastfeeding is wonderful that is MY opinion based on my own experience. Just like I don't force my religion or political views on anyone else I will not force how I feed my child on a new mom.

So remember that it is your choice. You are the one who will have to live with it no one else so don't let anyone else convince you their way is better than yours.

Because it isn't. It's just different.

Return to Part III of this Series

Breastfeeding VS. Formula Part III: What to do?

For me it was easy to decide for a lot reasons the main ones being its better and costs less money. But I don't think the decision is quite so easy for some people.

So here's how I think everyone should look at it.

1. What's better for the baby?

This is the most important because your baby doesn't have an option. You're deciding. They have no say.

And I think this is always breastmilk

2. What's better for mom?

Because your advocating for your baby its hard to look at this alone but its important too.

Happy mom = happy baby

I would take a look at each and see what would fit my lifestyle better. Although pumping is an option for working mom it may not be better for mom. Try and look at every aspect. Time constraints, money, how you feel etc.

3. When one and two are different

What happens when what's best for baby isn't best for mom? Well I think you have to look at it together. Is mom going to be that unhappy? Is it impossible for mom to pump or find a milk bank to buy from? (Being as best for baby is always breast milk) If answers are yes then try it. If it doesn't work out move on to formula. Because that is always an option... you can't really decide to breastfeed after weeks of formula.

I don't want to sound like I think formula is poison. It's not. Its an amazing invention that allows people to feed their baby when they a. Don't have enough (or any) milk b. Have a baby who wont latch c. When breastfeeding is medically impossible.

BUT I do think formula should never be the first option. For all that can breastmilk should be the first choice. If it doesn't work, it just doesn't work. Move on. But how will you know if you don't try?

Of course many people out there just don't want to... to each their own. No judging here. I even might be singing a different tune had breastfeeding not be so ridiculously easy.

After all you're the mom and its your decision. Do what you believe is right. For me it was breastfeeding but for a lot if people its formula.

Go to Part IV of this series. Or return to Part II of this series

Em's Cousin Vincent

I lost my nephew to child abuse three years ago today.

You never think it's going to happen to you. And then one day, it does. You read these horror stories or watch them on the news and you think how did it go that far? How did someone not see it? How did it end up like that?

And you know what? I think the same thing about Vince.

I saw him a weekend before it happened. He spent the day at my mom's house. Before that I hadn't seen him in 6 months. And I remember thinking, something's off. He looks unhappy. He looks skinny. He looks... different.

This was him as I remember him...



And then when I saw him the last time...



His "mom" had just recently left my brother and so I thought maybe it was that. He missed his daddy. I'd heard of children regressing when their parents split up, even at a young age so I contributed it to that and the bruises were all explained.

He fell.

Oh, I accidentally hit his head on the car door.

He bumped into the table.

Well, that sounded reasonable. I have 6 other nieces and nephews and all of them are covered in bruises 95 percent of the time from something they decided was a good idea. Like jumping on the bed. Or rolling down the stairs in a laundry basket. You know kids.

But I think back to that particular day a lot and wish I would have done something right then. I struggle with exactly what. Call the police? Social services? Just take him with me?

Something. Anything.

And every time I think about it, I feel guilty. Because I know that if I would have done something that day everything would be so much different now.

But I didn't. And that next weekend I didn't get to see him. And I will never get to again.

That next weekend I went to her baby shower of the newest addition to the family. 6 week old Tarah Jayne, Vincents little sister.

Vincent did not join us that day. She said he was sick. He had "pink eye".

Later in the day she got a call informing her that Vincent was in the hospital. Unconscious. He had not woke up from his nap.

There are no words to explain how I felt at that moment. And I'm a writer. I use words to express everything. But I can't even begin. It something that goes beyond words.

We drove to the hospital and once we were together in a small room, my brother and step dad both missing because my brother couldn't be found and my step dad was on his way in from another town. The doctor joined us and informed us that Vincent was gone.

And I knew then it wasn't an accident. It wasn't a disease. Someone had done it to him. I was certain before anything else happened that Vincent had been hurt purposely. That his mom had chose the wrong guy to live with.

I went with my mom to find my brother. And we found him. And I was the one to inform him that Vincent was in the hospital. That he needed to go there and say goodbye because he wasn't going to wake up. That Vincent James Hill, his little boy, was gone.

I'll never forget that.

Katheryen "Nycole" Dale, Vincents mother, was convicted of 3 years in prison. Chad Char was sentenced to 20 years after accepting a plea agreement.

You can read the story here. There are quite a few news stories of it but I "like" this one because the title is "People You'll See in Hell". It isn't for the faint hearted. Trust me.

I miss him. And I wish I could go back and change everything. I wish I could take him and his little sister away from that house. I wish I could stop it.

But I can't go back. And even though Vincent is gone little Miss Tarah Jayne is still here. And she's a beautiful happy little girl with a very amazing angel watching over her.

Breastfeeding VS. Formula Part II: Formula Benefits

Now I can't say I really thought there was more benefits while I was pregnant I did come to see them while breastfeeding.

1. A Break: Oh how I wanted someone else to feed her just once! I wanted more than 3-4 hours of sleep. I could have managed it with pumping and giving a bottle but I didn't want nipple confusion.

2. A Different Kind Of Convenience: I was always worried about supply and being with my baby all the time. Formula can be given by anyone. No worrying about supply and demand either.

3. Public Displays: Im shy. I can't help it so breastfeeding in public is very off putting for me. (Don't mind seeing it but I hate having to do it!) With a bottle there is no pulling up your shirt in a public place

4. Opinions on Weaning: God everyone has a idea about when you have to stop. Some say when baby has teeth. Others age one. And some who say until baby wants to. Let people make their own decisions! Formula you stop at one year. (People do, however, have opinions on when to stop giving a bottle)

5.Eating/Drinking whatever whenever: alcohol for one and all the foods doctors say you shouldn't eat. Broccoli beans dairy eggs etc.

These are the reasons I thought about using formula but I never did. But as much as people talk about the benefits of breastfeeding I thought these should be said as well.

See Part III of this series. Or return to Part I of this series.

Breastfeeding VS. Formula Part I: Breastmilk Benefits

Formula is so common now that it seems like sometimes there is no reason to breastfeed. Worrying about supply and being away from your baby do add to fact many people don't bother to breastfeed. But we, I think, are forgetting about the benefits.

Im going to list a few here that made me decide breastfeeding was best.

1. It's natural. We may not know everything that goes into it but we do know there isn't anything artificial

2. Antibodies: More antibodies = better chance of not getting sick. And I didn't ever want to see my baby sick. Especially not after those first few days. (Read here, here, here, and here)

3. Bonding I do not think this is just limited to breastfeeding but I think its easier to do. With formula (bottles) its a lot easier to delegate it off(this is not so bad) to someone else and when old enough to prob the bottle or just give it to the child.

4. Cheaper (money wise): Realistically formula was just not an option we could afford

5. Convenience: No bottles or water or formula to remember just a lift of the shirt!

Those are the five reasons I choose to breastfeed before I even had a baby but there are so many more benefits. Here are a couple of links...

1. Benefits of Breastfeeding

2. How Breastfeeding benefits You and Your Baby

3. Why Breastfeeding Is Important

4. Why Breast Is Best

Number 4 is a link to MANY pages that state different benefits.

But like I stated before breastfeeding isn't all roses and sometimes the drawbacks outweigh the benefits.. especially when formula feeding has its own benefits.

Check out Part II Formula benefits

Why I Breastfeed..

When I was little it was never a question I'd thought about. My dolls were given bottles of pretend formula. And I always imagined myself doing the same for my real babies.

Formula is EVERYWHERE. In my entire life I've seen someone breastfeeding all of 3 times. 2 were not even in the U.S.

I'm not sure why I even decided I would breastfeed. No one in my family did (except my own mom for all of 3 months) so it wasn't normal to me.

But when I got pregnant I researched everything. (Really--Everything) And I read What to Expect In The First Year which had quite a bit of information on breastfeeding alone. I read articles about the benefits. I read articles about the benefits being way overestimated. I read about the bonding and articles about how time consuming it was. I read about doctors who pushed formula and women getting in traps by schedules and supplements.

By the time I was 25 weeks pregnant I swore I was an expert. And I decided a few things.

1. I was going to breastfeed.
2. I would breastfeed for 1 year
3. I would not supplement

All three of these things I decided I would do for my baby. Not me. If it was up to me. Formula. But this was my baby and no one can convince me formula is just as good for babies.

It's not.

Science is a wonderful amazing thing but nature is better.

Now I don't want to sound judgmental because if breastfeeding hadn't been an option I wouldn't have thought twice about using formula but because it was an option I didn't think twice about not.

So back to the real question. Why do I breastfeed?

1. For my daughter: It's natural. There is nothing artificial about it. It's giving her the best start possible.

2. For me: I didn't realize it at first but now I do. I also breastfeed for me. It's relaxing and easy and I feel better about myself as a mom by doing so.

3. For my family: Breastfeeding is so much cheaper! And it saves my husband and I lots of money every month.

4. For everyone: I honestly believe the more normal breastfeeding becomes, the more women will start doing it (much to the dismay of formula companies) and I think I contribute to making it more normal so one day another women will see it's the best way to go

Why do you breastfeed? Or why don't you?

Valentine's Day

The thing I think about the most on Valentines Day is from a movie… which I can’t seem to recall the name of… but it doesn’t matter. It isn’t hearts or Love or spending time with my husband (am I awful or what?) but the line “Valentines Day is a holiday invented by greeting card companies to make people feel like crap”.

Now while I have a husband and we’ve been together for the past 6 Valentine’s days I do remember those years I didn’t have someone. Well, I was in high school but still I think it does make people feel like crap. Especially if all your friends/siblings/parents have someone to spend it with and you don’t. You can stay home every night of the week and be completely fine with it but then it’s Valentines and you feel pretty lonely.

What does this have to do with Em?

Nothing really except I hope she doesn’t have to feel like that.

There is something about being a mom, or parent really, that makes you want to prevent your child from feeling any pain whatsoever. But you can’t and even if you could, should you?

Pain is important. It stops us from burning off our hand when we pull something out of the stove. It stops us from trying to walk on a broken leg. It keeps us from returning to the guy who made us feel worthless.

Without pain the world would be a disaster.

So a little pain for our children is good. It teaches them (and us) about what to do. And plus if you never have bad Valentines days, you’ll never appreciate the really good ones.

 

Outtings With A Baby

I thought I was an awful packer and then I met my little girl. And things got so much worse..

WOW. Who would have thought a day trip would require so many things! This weekend we are going to Calacali because a cousin of Pedro’s is going to be here from China and the whole family is getting together so we are going to take Em who will be just about 7 weeks old.

And I’ve already started planning and packing. Good thing she doesn’t need formula because that would be overkill.

Diapers and wipes and clothes and blankets and burp rags.

I don’t even want to think about when we are going to stay the night somewhere. She’ll need a place to sleep, stroller and baby carrier, toys etc

Before I returned to Ecuador after visiting my parents I remember my sister telling me “Gone are the days you can just leave the house”. While that is not entirely true because when we decide we want to go to the store we just go. No extra clothes or diapers and she sits comfortably in her wrap,  but there is A LOT of truth to it as well.

And I do miss just telling Pedro, let’s go do this and going. No extra planning of how Em will handle it or if Em can handle it at all. We just went without thinking.

And it sucks and honestly I think it is going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better.

Babies and Pets

When I was born my mom had two cats, a dog, and a bird all in the house. Our cats came and went and so did our dog. Later on I let the bird go myself. I wanted to see it fly and I was certain it would come back. But it didn’t.

I’m sure I was sick a few times as a baby and child but nothing major. Nothing that killed me (obviously) and nothing that I had to be hospitalized for. Truth be told I’ve only been in the hospital once besides my pregnancy. When I was 6 months old I swallowed a penny and they had to take it out. Pretty simple. No cutting. They reached down my throat and pulled it out.

And this is the same for my brothers and sister. We were extremely healthy children. And we had animals. We played in the dirt with them, we ate their food with them. And guess what? We lived.

Em’s pediatrician freaked my husband out saying the cat was going to give Em a disease or something. He had no idea what to do. If it wasn’t for my background with animals I probably would have been just as afraid but as it were I had animals and I wasn’t getting rid of penny because we had Em. Penny is mine too.

Right now things may be a little complicated. We shut Ems room while she naps in there. We make sure we don’t lay her down on the carpet without a blanket because of how much hair penny throws. But later on Penny and Em will be friends, I think. Or at least I hope they will. Penny is kind of anti-social. But oh well…

And plus her pediatrician is an idiot.

A doctor, sure. But an idiot. Hasn’t he read any studies? Animals in the house are SO much better!

Here are a couple of links… here and here.

Anyway it looks to me they are getting along already..

Motherhood Is...

HARD.

Honestly I never imagined it being so difficult. I have 7 nieces and nephews and I watched them all grow up. Some lived with me for some time and watching their parents raise them… well it seemed easy. It seemed like it was a piece of cake.

Yeah, no sleep but I never have slept much anyway so it wasn’t that big of a deal.

No the sleep thing didn’t seem too important. And even now that isn’t what’s so hard.

It’s the no time alone, to do anything, to clean to write to make supper whatever. THERE IS NO TIME.

I’ve stayed at home for almost 3 years without children. Sometimes I work, sometimes I don’t but unlike other people I don’t get bored.  I have things to do. I write, mostly. And I like being alone. I like time to myself.

Apparently that ends COMPLETELY when you have a baby. AND when the baby does sleep and you do have time to yourself you want/need sleep to. So nothing EVER gets done. That’s what’s hard about motherhood.

AND in that off chance when you do have some free time by yourself… when your husband takes her to her grandparents for a afternoon, well all you do is think about her. Watch her smiles, see her discover something new.

Everything else? Not so hard. Feeding her, catching spit up, changing diapers, bad naps. That’s easy in comparison to giving up all of your free time. But it’s worth it because honestly she will only be this small for a little while. And one day (maybe a LONG time from now) I know I’ll miss the days when she only wanted to be with me.

So yeah, motherhood is hard but if it wasn’t hard then it wouldn’t be as rewarding, I think.

Plus, how can you look at this face and not be so completely and totally one hundred percent in LOVE!

So yeah motherhood is HARD but it is also wonderful and amazing and crazy and the best!